In Hiding (Ashamed)

About This Piece

As humans, we long for joy, connection, and belonging. The greatest obstacle in our way is shame. Shame makes us believe that we are inherently and irreparably flawed, and therefore unworthy of love and connection.

We deal with shame in a few ways. Some of us hide, withdraw, and silence ourselves. Some deal with shame by seeking to appease and please others. And others become aggressive and try to gain power by shaming the people around them. These strategies may be our natural response, but they don’t help us effectively navigate shame.

What we need most is to share our stories and experiences with someone we trust. Someone who can offer a compassionate and non-judgmental presence, and remind us that we are not alone, abnormal, or unworthy. Just as shame happens in community, it can be healed in community.

What triggers shame for you? What are you afraid of people discovering about you? Think of someone who has earned the right to hear your story; someone who can offer you the connection and empathy you need. What might it be like to share your shame experience with them? What might hold you back?